Wednesday, April 18, 2012


I wrote this many years ago, as I began dating my husband & had a huge wall up to protect the end, there was no need :)

Beyond the wall
She’s built so high
Is a woman who feels
And yes, she does cry

She appears so strong
As she holds him at bay
But she’s really thinking
“I hope he will stay”

She can’t let him in
Although he does try
She’d be too exposed –
My God, she would die!

For in her head,
That Voice drones on –
Saying over and over
“One day he’ll be gone”

Then where would she be
With her heart on the floor
Rejected and hurt
And alone once more

“Don’t let down your guard!”
It screams and it shouts
As the other voice struggles
“Stop having these doubts!”

So they fight inside her
Day after day
Each of them sometimes
Getting their way

She wants so badly
To let go and feel
All the magic and joy
Of a love that is real

But she’s only a Pawn –
The one who hides
In the corner away
From these battling sides

She is weak and frail
So the others must stay
In order to keep
All that pain locked away

Beyond the wall
Is a Garden of Fear
Where they all reside
So comfortably here

First there is Anger
The one who Explodes
At the drop of a hat
As her inside erodes

Next there is Need
With a hole in its soul
That can never be filled
Though that is her goal

Then there’s Control
Who must have the power
She’s strong and stubborn
So she guards the tower

For once she was helpless
It can’t happen again
Now she’s in control
And determines just when

Sadist dwells here
Along with the rest
She’s vindictive and cold
When she’s at her best

She must punish others
Like she used to be
Make Them all feel Hurt
Maybe then they will see

Self-Hate is present
To remind her she’s dirt
To perpetuate the pattern
And continue the hurt

So that’s just a taste
Of what does occur
Beyond that great wall -
They’re all part of her

1 comment:

  1. Dawn this is wonderful!! Expressive, revealing and very much true.